To Feel True Joy

I got up this morning. Tuesday. The morning after the Martin Luther King Jr. three day weekend. It’s the day back to school, and back to work. And for me, another day of waiting for my job and sitting at home with my dogs and cat. It was a two-hour delay according to the school district, so everyone got out two hours later, which is about the time I get up.

I came down stairs, and walked my dogs because nobody else will. Since it snowed last night, for the first official time this winter season, my one dog, Charlie, started eating the snow when we were outside. All three of them were not used to the white terrain, and they were annoying and adorable as always.

I came inside and went to the kitchen, got myself some food, and looked out the window. Then suddenly it hit me- a pure and impenetrable joy, from deep inside myself. It needed no reason for being there other than just to be there. It was one of the truest forms of happiness that I have experienced in a while. I’m sure there have been plenty of other times throughout my life, but now I recognized it and was able to understand it better, which compelled me to write about it. Thinking about all the projects I want to do, whether or not I do them, and of the food I was about to eat, I became filled with this joy, contentment, and peace. Something more than just happiness. I was excited for the possibility of what was to come. It was a joy that had no reason for being there, other than to celebrate the fact that I was alive, and that I have to ability to do whatever I want with my day.

So now I sit here eating homemade nachos and leftover birthday cake, and having to shut my dogs up every five minutes. However, despite that, and despite the fact that I don’t know when I’m going back to work, despite every bad thought I can muster in my head, I know what it means to feel true joy. It’s a feeling I can make last, even for just a day, even for just an hour. The only thing I can do, is continue to be grateful for living, and continue to live. If I try hard enough, I keep the good feelings in, and the bad thoughts out.

I hope you all get a chance to experience this and recognize it, or that you already have. I also hope it will be a recurring thing, not just for me, but for everyone.

If you are feeling down today, just remember that you are alive, and that you can change the bad thoughts that go in your head. You can change how you feel about certain situations, and you have to ability to react differently to them. There’s so much power inside you that you don’t even know you have. And you don’t need to seek it, or try to change yourself to find it. It is there simply because you’re alive. That is the only requirement for true joy- being alive.

Have a lovely day.